Surgery (Part 1)

Surgery was yesterday.  Or should I say surgerIES, plural!

I had the first surgery time slot of the day (7:30 am) but had to be there 2 hours early.  Pre-op procedures and all.  My dad and Billy took me to the hospital and would stay until I was out of recovery, then switch with my mom and she would stay the night with me.

My mom had the kids during the day since they have a standing playdate on Fridays.  I wanted to keep things as "normal" as possible for the kid, but they still knew something was up.  We had talked to them a lot about how Mommy had an "ouchy tummy" and was going to have surgery.  I know everybody, including my kids, were anxious and excited for me to finally be healthy again (as in, not in horrific pain and completely bed ridden for weeks at a time).

I checked in, signed all the waivers, and got my wrist band.  As we were waiting, I went over the kids' schedule with Billy for what seemed like the fifteenth time.  Remember to take them to Pottery Barn Kids for Dr. Seuss story time, don't forget their goggles for swim class, make sure they eat their vitamins.  Billy just rolled his eyes.  I would be in the hospital for less than 2 days, plus he is a great dad and more than capable of taking care of the kids on his own.  I think I just needed something else to focus on besides my own apprehension.  (Was the surgery going to work?  What were they going to find when they got in there?  Would I be able to keep one ovary?).

A few minutes later the nurse called me back.  In my previous surgery experiences, someone (usually just one person) was allowed to come with me.  Not this time though.  The nurse did say that Billy, and I assumed my dad too, could come see me before I got wheeled back.

Now I was officially nervous.  Whenever I'm anxious or stressed, especially in social settings, I talk a lot.  So in the short time it took to take my vitals, the nurse must have felt like we were new BFF's.

Then it was time to do the IV.  Not usually a good experience for me, and as much as I wish I could say this time was different, it wasn't.  I was already sweating just thinking about it.  

They tried my left hand first.  Then my my left wrist.  Then my left hand again.  I have small veins and they tend to roll, making it that much harder.  A different nurse tried my right hand, then my right wrist, and finally ended up putting it in the crook of my arm.  Not the most ideal placement - anesthesiologists prefer the IV be in a location as far away from the body as possible.  But by this time it was 7:35 and we were running late.  There was a lot of rushing around but the nurse let Billy come back really quick and give me a kiss.  Then she gave me some "happy medicine" (Valium I think) and everything else is a bit blurry.

I consider myself somewhat of a pro when it comes to surgeries.  I've had 5 major surgeries, plus several other procedures in which I was also put under anesthesia.  As expected the operating room was cold, there was music playing lightly in the background, and lots of bright lights and people in blue scrubs.  I remember saying something about it being a "girl party" since both my OBGYN surgeons were women, as were both anesthesiologists, and all of the nurses.  The general surgeon was a man though, and he got there just as I was falling asleep.

Speaking of the general surgeon, he was a last minute addition.  At my pre-op appointment on Monday I was in a lot of pain, even more than normal.  Even with the suppression shot (which was supposed to prevent me from getting a menstrual cycle), I had such severe cramps I couldn't even stand up straight.  When the nurse came to get me I was crouched in a chair.  She was used to seeing me like this and gave me a sad smile, the same sad smile I'd seen so many times before.  But this time it came with something I wasn't nearly as familiar with - a sense of "this will all be over soon enough"!!!!!

I could also see something else in her eyes: REASSURANCE.  That this phase of my life would soon be over.  That there would no more urgent phone calls to the advice nurse, frantic trips to the pharmacy to pick up pain meds, or being so incapacitated I miss out on activities with my kids and husband.  That all of the pain and suffering was finally coming to an end.

Dr. S asked me to describe the pain.  A description we were both all too familiar with - on the right side from my hip bone up to the middle of my rib cage.  Same as always.  There was something else though.  A few days earlier I felt what I thought was a "lump" in my upper abdomen, also on the right side.  She had me lie back and very gently pressed down.  I gasped when she got directly on the spot.  "What is THAT?" she asked, more to herself than me.  I could tell she was surprised but all I could think was, please don't tell me have to delay the surgery - or even worse, cancel it altogether?

She very calmly told me I needed to get an ultrasound.  Right away!  I could tell she was trying not to freak me out - and if I hadn't been in so much pain I probably would have been.  She told me she needed to be able to see exactly what it looked like and where it was located.

I wouldn't know any of this until the next day, but it ended up being quite large (about 3cm) and under the muscular wall in the right upper quadrant of my abdomen.  We agreed it would definitely need to be removed.  Thankfully Dr. S (and her seemingly endless supply of miracles!) was able to get a general surgeon to come on board at the last minute.  The surgery was still a GO!

To be continued ...